roses

Bali was a good reminder that the only kind of blues that you should be letting into your life are beach blues.

Today, I almost couldn't pull myself out of bed #whatsnew because it felt too physically and mentally exhausting to wake up and do Life. My shoulders breaking and my limbs sore (must've been the water rafting) from the trip, but above all, my mind and heart heavy from that imprint of you and your better half in my head. Bali kept the wild thoughts at bay for awhile but this morning, I still struggled to swallow the bitter pill. 

You checked all the boxes, and even if you didn't, it didn't really mattered. You made me rethink my ideals/standards, and for you I'd make every and any exception. If I had to do it all over again, I'd pick you in a heartbeat, and perhaps milliseconds earlier. You were a big part of what I wanted, and now what I need to go looking for, less the angst, goodbye and heartbreak. 

And it's time I kill off this character (don't worry, just figuratively) but I'll do away with the thanks and well wishes the way dismal lovers like to do. Because as much as the ray of sunshine that you've been, you were also a hell of a heartbreak and there's really nothing much to thank about that. I only wish the best for myself to recover and if that ever happens, I only have myself to thank #reasonswhyimsingle