checkchocolate*

come what may. but first, let me whine.

I know how I should stop being a baby, but I'm like really quite reluctant to leave?! Though I haven't exactly been very friendly before, I'd still miss the carefree environment and its people. Guess I might not feel that down/uncertain if I was moving on to a better place, but it's just going to be different when we're talking about only-i-know-where. :( I already don't feel like embracing Monday. I try to think about positive things that may outweigh the agony like maybe the better toilets or cheaper food, but I guess they can't really make up for the freedom and peace I enjoyed? (still can't really believe they'll be gone so fast)

You need to have a reason, even for banishing people to hell. Not to mention switching between places, as and when you please. I mean, I just don't get the rationale behind the arrangement, and specifically MY arrangement; go to hell, savor a bit of sweetness, and then burn in hell again. (seriously out of point can) Not to mention I don't even have a say. And to make matters worse, judgement days always coincide with hellish days and my fate continues to lie in the hands of the evil stepmothers/stepsisters. :(

I know it's not exactly the right reason to get all emotional/whiney because;

1) Everyone else, including myself, will move on.

2) I've burnt in hell for a longer time before and it's only for 1.5 months more.

3) This is not going to kill me, hell NO.

But then again, it's because I've been there before. And for the first time, uncertainty just isn't scary anymore. It's being fully aware of what lies ahead that's agonizing. :/ I don't even know why I'm this afraid having been there before, but I'm just afraid ok. :(

Hopefully, I'm just scaring myself. but f***, seriously.