checkchocolate*

Just saying..

(kindly ignore if you can't find meaning in this)

I need to be truer to myself and address the little voice inside that's constantly reminding me not to succumb to temptations /envy / jealousy / short-term self satisfaction / false victories. It says that nothing else matters more than the happiness and well-being of me, myself, I and those whom I love with my life. For those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.

Pride, for that matter, is only secondary. What's the worth of great lengths gone just to create a facade? And why bestow the authority to change your life (or even you) on third persons? You'd lose yourself amidst all that running about and playing fetch, lose yourself to the puppet show. You'd get confused, and eventually forget who you were in the first place. You can emerge victorious in that one fake moment, but for as long as you place the wrong people above you, you'll always feel defeated and then give it all to feel like a winner for that one plastic moment again. Stupid vicious cycle that could destroy you completely, so stop being delusional. There is no race, stop hurting yourself trying to vie for a non-existent trophy. Furthermore, those who truly love you back will never bring you down or challenge you.

Have been making the same mistake and self-torturing for like half my life.

I need to stop letting this get to me, focus on the things i have don't have could have may have want to have before i make the mistake of trading them off to feed my oh-so-dear pride. I need to stroll (in the direction i want) and breathe easy.

Damn, i missed you. ;(